SETI Movie Reviews

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Family movie reviews for "SETI" sorted by average review score:
The Trumpet of the Swan
Released in Theatrical Release by ()
MPAA Rating: G (General Audience)
Directors: Richard Rich and Terry L. Noss
Starring: Jason Alexander
Jason Alexander's vocal performance as the hambone father of Louie, a mute trumpet swan, is quite simply the most entertaining element of Trumpet of the Swan, an animated version of E.B. White's children's novel. Given to long-winded speeches and flamboyant displays (Alexander's extended "death scene" after his character is knicked on the wing is a hoot), the former George Costanza's hot-air waterfowl partially salvages this oddly unmoving family feature. The story concerns the silent Louie (his thoughts are spoken by actor Jeffrey Schoeny), who suffers the ridicule of other swans but communicates a depth of feeling by playing a brass horn. The restless script has difficulty developing a coherent emotional rise; director Richard Rich (The Swan Princess) would have done well to cut back on the number of discrete episodes that rush by with dizzying, graceless speed. Joe Mantegna signs on as the voice of a big-city scoundrel who signs Louie to an exploitative music contract, while Mary Steenburgen plays Louie's mother, and Reese Witherspoon speaks for the hero's true love. --Tom Keogh
Average review score:

Not as good as Charlotte's Web
Charlotte's Web is the only movie my 3 year old son has taken any interest in. He watches it over and over. I love Charlotte's Web too, but I've been looking for another movie that he likes equally well. I thought a movie based on a book written by the same author would be just the thing. Nope. He took Trumpet of the Swan out midway through and put Charlotte's Web in. I'll admit that I didn't like it nearly as much either. I didn't find the animation and audio objectionable ( 3 year olds don't care), but the story just seemed a little slow. This movie will probably sit on the shelf.

I like it all
I sort of liked the story. I didn't like when the father gets hurt but I liked when Serena was like um like you know well I liked when Louis gives Serena his heart cause he loves her.

Heartwarming and just plain nice movie for kids.........
My 3 1/2 year old son loves this movie. It is genuine and cute. I'd recommend it as a great addition to any family video collection.

The Trumpet of the Swan
Released in DVD by Columbia/Tristar Studios (31 July, 2001)
MPAA Rating: G (General Audience)
Directors: Richard Rich and Terry L. Noss
Starring: Jason Alexander
Jason Alexander's vocal performance as the hambone father of Louie, a mute trumpet swan, is quite simply the most entertaining element of Trumpet of the Swan, an animated version of E.B. White's children's novel. Given to long-winded speeches and flamboyant displays (Alexander's extended "death scene" after his character is knicked on the wing is a hoot), the former George Costanza's hot-air waterfowl partially salvages this oddly unmoving family feature. The story concerns the silent Louie (his thoughts are spoken by actor Jeffrey Schoeny), who suffers the ridicule of other swans but communicates a depth of feeling by playing a brass horn. The restless script has difficulty developing a coherent emotional rise; director Richard Rich (The Swan Princess) would have done well to cut back on the number of discrete episodes that rush by with dizzying, graceless speed. Joe Mantegna signs on as the voice of a big-city scoundrel who signs Louie to an exploitative music contract, while Mary Steenburgen plays Louie's mother, and Reese Witherspoon speaks for the hero's true love. --Tom Keogh
Average review score:

Not as good as Charlotte's Web
Charlotte's Web is the only movie my 3 year old son has taken any interest in. He watches it over and over. I love Charlotte's Web too, but I've been looking for another movie that he likes equally well. I thought a movie based on a book written by the same author would be just the thing. Nope. He took Trumpet of the Swan out midway through and put Charlotte's Web in. I'll admit that I didn't like it nearly as much either. I didn't find the animation and audio objectionable ( 3 year olds don't care), but the story just seemed a little slow. This movie will probably sit on the shelf.

I like it all
I sort of liked the story. I didn't like when the father gets hurt but I liked when Serena was like um like you know well I liked when Louis gives Serena his heart cause he loves her.

Heartwarming and just plain nice movie for kids.........
My 3 1/2 year old son loves this movie. It is genuine and cute. I'd recommend it as a great addition to any family video collection.

Arc the Lad - Day Of Reckoning (Vol. 6)
Released in DVD by A.D. Vision (22 January, 2002)
MPAA Rating: NR (Not Rated)
Director: Toshiaki Kawasaki
Average review score:

An unworthy addition to a series.
I honestly feel hurt that the creators of arc the lad decided to make one of the most boring dvds possible. This series has just gone downhill though. I have seen all of it except dvd 3, but can clearly point out many problems with it. The series starts out good, a fresh character and his dog to get you going. By the end though, you could probably care less about everyone. This dvd shows how bad you can turn a series with just a few episodes.

You meet up with Clive, that evil guy that is always evil. Apparently he is evil because he likes being evil(that is his entire motivation). He wants to open some box(like the box is crazy and has these mysterious powers like arc) that will turn stuff into demons, or something. Anyways Eliza is just a sub character that really isn't that cool, shes just there for a sappy love story, and Elk's motivation. Elk finally seems to "understand" that he needs to stop whining over stuff and just be a man about it. It isn't all that glorious. Anyways, the problem is action. The series does not have enough action and this dvd seems to try to avoid action at all costs. We are gonna see shu and tosh fight together? No, they decide to cut out the fight right before it starts, which is totally stupid, because the fight would have rocked. We are going to see that old dude, merchant, and the drummer boy fight?(i forget the names because the characters were boring) No, they decide to show an explosion and bam cut out of that fight scene too. Ok so we go to this temple thingy. "Guess what, lots of talking." This quote I think really captures the essence of that last episode or 2.

Than with like, a flash of light, it ends. What was that? People like die than come back and die again but are still alive? Dude the creators just went totally off topic. Possibly the most idiotic thing they could of done and did do was try to make it a happy ending, yet everyone is shocked at everything. They try to move this thing for the plane and everyone is like, "Omg can they move it?" Shut up and help them! Theres always a problem, heres a tip, stop being so shocked at everything and start acting like real people.

In closing, this review is basically to tell you that this series lacks many things, and probably the ending does the series as much justice as evangelion's ending. And if you haven't seen evangelion's ending, it's horrible, confusing, and doesnt explain anything. Its one of those endings where you make your own conclusion, that is why it is bad.

Great show except for the ending
I see this alot in anime. Shows like Arch the Lad are absolutly wonderful until the last few episodes and then they just fall apart. I loved this series all the way up to about the last one or two episodes. Im not sure if this is the last DVD in the set but if it is, I was rather disapointed by it. Also there seems to be some sort of error on the chapters index.

It was good until the end..
Arc the Lad was one of the best anime's I have ever
watched(and my first anime also...)The storyline although based on the game was wonderful and left me on edge the whole time.
But like the curse of some anime's before it around the last few episodes the story fell apart and left many unanswered questions for the watcher. But up until the end I highly recomend
Arc the Lad.

F.A.R.T.: The Movie
Released in DVD by Spectrum Ent Product (04 February, 2003)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Matt Berman
Average review score:

Good storyline with some very funny scenes...
A little slow in the beginning with some over-the-top acting, but gradually the story begins to come together. Some good acting by relative unknowns. Kevin Farley, like his brother Chris, makes a great "buddy" and plays the frat-boy role well. Somewhat like a Saturday Night Live skit, some scenes go farther than they should to get a laugh. Otherwise it's a film that makes you laugh and smile and feel good at the end. It reminded me of "The Sure Thing".

This film is just plain funny!
I almost pity those inner-city people who didn't have much opportunity to use and abuse their drive-in theaters years ago. Drive-in theaters are all but dead, and that is sad, but times change and communities alter and grow. But back when I was younger, our county had the Allred Drive-in and that was where the more sedate teens went to have their kicks on the weekends. We were offered up a wide variety of films to enhance our drinking and/or our sexual adventures. We had everything from major action films to gawd-awful Euro-trash horror to the occasional soft-core porn documentary. I am NOT joking. But the main diet we were served tended to be teen comedies, from the hits like Porky's and Fast Times at Ridgemont High to dozens of cheap clones whose names and plots blur together in a 3.2 beer haze. And I miss those days of settling in with a cooler full of beer and laughing at and with whatever goofy nonsense flittered across the screen.

F.A.R.T. The Movie, written and directed by Matt Berman, is like a trip back to the drive-in in the mid-eighties. It tells the story of Artie (Seth Walther), who was born with the disorder of rampant flatulence. In basic terms he farts, and the more upset or nervous he becomes, the more he farts. With such a problem, it is no wonder the guy has low self-esteem. So like every nerdy guy out there, he has a woman who becomes his dream, his fantasy, his ever-distant object of desire. In this case that would be Andre'a Parker (Christine Steel), the cold and insulting woman Artie would die for. His buddies, Bear (Kevin Farley), Scooter (John Farley), and Donnie (Chris Soldevilla), all accept his obsession and try to down play it as much as they can. We meet the characters as they return for what should be their last year of college. In the course of settling back in for the new semester, Artie meets and helps Emily (Heather McComb), a new student transferring in from an all-girl school. Instant attraction on both sides, of course. But being the simple creatures we men are, we can't just forget years of obsessing over that which we can never have, and there you have Artie's basic point of conflict throughout the film.

Let's cut straight to the core of this film. The whole fart disorder thing is mostly a gimmick. I love fart humor; a good number of guys do, and even a few women do as well. Almost everyone has fond memories of the campfire scene in Blazing Saddles. F.A.R.T. The Movie has a great scene when Artie goes with Emily to have dinner at her grandparents with a number of truly funny fart-related jokes. But the disorder tends to come and go when it should or possibly could make its presence known. So when you peel that element away, you are left with a fairly basic romantic comedy. It plays itself out fairly well, with an ending that is somewhat forced. It's too late to change things now, but if there had been just one other scene of development between the main characters, perhaps some deeper emotional connections would have been better established. When the material is middle of the road, it takes the cast to carry things across the finish line with grace, and the cast does a good job here.

Seth Walther plays Artie as the typical dorky but likeable guy who speaks for all the silent nerd types out there who ever lusted after a woman with enough conviction that it almost borders on becoming a stalker. Artie's friends are handled well and with almost manic confidence by the Farley men and Mr. Soldevilla. Christine Steel plays Andre'a with enough humanity that you can see how Artie could develop an obsession, but offers up enough coldness that you have to wonder why Artie can't see that she is out of reach. Then you have Heather McComb pumping her slightly underdeveloped character full of good-natured warmth and openness that will have guys wondering "Why didn't I meet women like this in college?" The overall look of the film is workable.

It has the whole "shot-on-location with a minimal budget" look that helps this kind of film appear more like what I remember my college days to be like. Big Hollywood films tend to want the whole Ivy League look in their films, but, face it, a big chunk of us didn't go to Harvard or Yale. The director acknowledges that the bulk of his cast don't look to be college age, and I have to admit that I was slightly thrown by that at first, but as the film progresses, you accept the characters and ignore the age thing. However, when they start referencing television programs like Cannon with William Conrad (the series ended around 1976), you can't help but wonder how old these people really are. So grab some beer, pizza, and a few friends and kick back to watch F.A.R.T. The Movie. Laugh, talk, and have fun like you would have if you were at the drive-in. And if you don't remember much about the movie after a few days, that just gives you a good excuse to do it all over again.

A throw back to Porky's and the fun of the 80's
I almost pity those inner-city people who didn't have much opportunity to use and abuse their drive-in theaters years ago. Drive-in theaters are all but dead, and that is sad, but times change and communities alter and grow. But back when I was younger, our county had the Allred Drive-in and that was where the more sedate teens went to have their kicks on the weekends. We were offered up a wide variety of films to enhance our drinking and/or our sexual adventures. We had everything from major action films to gawd-awful Euro-trash horror to the occasional soft-core porn documentary. I am NOT joking. But the main diet we were served tended to be teen comedies, from the hits like Porky's and Fast Times at Ridgemont High to dozens of cheap clones whose names and plots blur together in a 3.2 beer haze. And I miss those days of settling in with a cooler full of beer and laughing at and with whatever goofy nonsense flittered across the screen.

F.A.R.T. The Movie, written and directed by Matt Berman, is like a trip back to the drive-in in the mid-eighties. It tells the story of Artie (Seth Walther), who was born with the disorder of rampant flatulence. In basic terms he farts, and the more upset or nervous he becomes, the more he farts. With such a problem, it is no wonder the guy has low self-esteem. So like every nerdy guy out there, he has a woman who becomes his dream, his fantasy, his ever-distant object of desire. In this case that would be Andre'a Parker (Christine Steel), the cold and insulting woman Artie would die for. His buddies, Bear (Kevin Farley), Scooter (John Farley), and Donnie (Chris Soldevilla), all accept his obsession and try to down play it as much as they can. We meet the characters as they return for what should be their last year of college. In the course of settling back in for the new semester, Artie meets and helps Emily (Heather McComb), a new student transferring in from an all-girl school. Instant attraction on both sides, of course. But being the simple creatures we men are, we can't just forget years of obsessing over that which we can never have, and there you have Artie's basic point of conflict throughout the film.

Let's cut straight to the core of this film. The whole fart disorder thing is mostly a gimmick. I love fart humor; a good number of guys do, and even a few women do as well. Almost everyone has fond memories of the campfire scene in Blazing Saddles. F.A.R.T. The Movie has a great scene when Artie goes with Emily to have dinner at her grandparents with a number of truly funny fart-related jokes. But the disorder tends to come and go when it should or possibly could make its presence known. So when you peel that element away, you are left with a fairly basic romantic comedy. It plays itself out fairly well, with an ending that is somewhat forced. It's too late to change things now, but if there had been just one other scene of development between the main characters, perhaps some deeper emotional connections would have been better established. When the material is middle of the road, it takes the cast to carry things across the finish line with grace, and the cast does a good job here. Seth Walther plays Artie as the typical dorky but likeable guy who speaks for all the silent nerd types out there who ever lusted after a woman with enough conviction that it almost borders on becoming a stalker. Artie's friends are handled well and with almost manic confidence by the Farley men and Mr. Soldevilla. Christine Steel plays Andre'a with enough humanity that you can see how Artie could develop an obsession, but offers up enough coldness that you have to wonder why Artie can't see that she is out of reach. Then you have Heather McComb pumping her slightly underdeveloped character full of good-natured warmth and openness that will have guys wondering "Why didn't I meet women like this in college?"

The overall look of the film is workable. It has the whole "shot-on-location with a minimal budget" look that helps this kind of film appear more like what I remember my college days to be like. Big Hollywood films tend to want the whole Ivy League look in their films, but, face it, a big chunk of us didn't go to Harvard or Yale. The director acknowledges that the bulk of his cast don't look to be college age, and I have to admit that I was slightly thrown by that at first, but as the film progresses, you accept the characters and ignore the age thing. However, when they start referencing television programs like Cannon with William Conrad (the series ended around 1976), you can't help but wonder how old these people really are. So grab some beer, pizza, and a few friends and kick back to watch F.A.R.T. The Movie. Laugh, talk, and have fun like you would have if you were at the drive-in. And if you don't remember much about the movie after a few days, that just gives you a good excuse to do it all over again.

Keep Your Eyes Open
Released in DVD by Artisan (Fox Video) (19 August, 2003)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Director: Tamra Davis
It's not hard to find extreme sports documentaries on DVD, but Keep Your Eyes Open is a cut above the norm. Hollywood director Tamra Davis (Billy Madison, Half Baked) brings to the genre a new polish, intellectual curiosity, and singularly interesting eye for unexplored camera angles and fresh visual settings. The subject is a little different, too: Keep Your Eyes Open concerns uniquely gifted athletes with a penchant for superior focus. They don't keep an eye on competitors, and they contemplate possible injury as something not to avoid but to predict. The talent roster includes skateboarders Eric Koston and Steve Berra, extraordinary skier Seth Morrison, 17-year-old motorcycle champion Travis Pastrana (who seems to dance with his bike while suspended in space), and hot-tempered surfer Sunny Garcia (whose fight for survival, learned on the tough side of Oahu, informs his sharp skills riding waves). Davis's husband, Mike D, makes an amusing cameo appearance as a security guard. --Tom Keogh
Average review score:

Not a movie; it's an advertisement
Summary:
Well, it's kind of hard to summarize this DVD because it isn't predominantly a movie, even though there is a ridiculously stupid movie within the action clips. So, I'll summarize the majority of the footage then I'll summarize the movie.

The footage is made up almost entirely of what appear to be stock shots of extreme sports, including: snowboarding, skiing, BMX, surfing, and motorcross. One athlete from each sport is highlighted (sometimes there are more, but they are pretty inconsistent on this) who then gives a spread out interview intermixed with scenes of them doing what they do.

The movie is a silly short about two skaters who pay a security guard to look the other way while they skate on a college campus. Then when his boss returns the guard and his boss chase the skaters until they end up running them over in their car, killing them, then burying them.

My Comments:
I'm going to reverse the order for my comments about the DVD.

The movie... The short is about the dumbest thing I've ever watched. There are a total of four characters - two skaters and two guards. The skaters say a total of roughly 10 words, all while they are pooling their money to bribe the guard. The rest of the movie they don't say anything, they just skate, and skate, and skate. The guards, on the other hand, can't seem to keep their mouths shut - which works against the movie, sadly, because they sound like two potheads. It's rather obvious that in real life they are probably best friends with skaters and despise security guards. The plot, of course, makes no sense because security guards don't sit at checkpoints on campuses and the majority of the skating is actually just around the city where the movie is filmed instead of on the campus. The plot was just set up for them to have an excuse to film the two skaters. Then, when the skaters are 'killed', it's blatantly obvious that they are mixing footage of dummies with footage of the real skaters - way low budget stuff here. Of course, maybe that was their intent, but it was still just plain silly. In short, the movie portion of this DVD is an absolute waste of film and DVD space. But despite it's problems, it really wasn't that much worse than the rest of the DVD because it was at least coherent and trying to tell a story, despite the horrible acting and plot.

The footage and interviews... This is really where I started to have a major problem with this DVD. Even though there is a director for the DVD, Tamra Davis, I got the impression that most of the footage was likely shot by someone else and she just got her hands on it after the fact then edited it together. So, despite some of the footage being pretty good, I don't think the producers of this DVD deserve any of that credit because I'm pretty sure they didn't do most of the filming.

As for the content, as I noted above, this is not a movie - there is no story here. This is really just an advertising gimmick for extreme sports. There are a bunch of shots of people doing cool things with the occasional wreck. The extent of the story is the brief interludes of some of the athletes telling about their lives, but the snippets are short and lost in the jumble of cuts from the other athletes and their footage.

This leads me to perhaps my biggest problem with this DVD - was there supposed to be an order to it? The interviews and footage don't follow any particular pattern. They start with one person, jump to two or three others, return to the first, then leave that person for 20 or 30 minutes before returning to them. It's almost as if the director and editor just said, "Well, we have this many video clips, let's put them into a randomizer and see what comes out." Et voila, you have Keep Your Eyes Open. This is why I think I ended up concluding that the DVD was really just an advertisement because there was no other way to interpret what took place. Also, keep in mind that interspersed with the footage and interviews are scenes from the actual movie.

Overall, this DVD was more frustrating and annoying than interesting. I never really got anything from it other than watching some cool tricks and feeling like I was watching a 75 minute advertisement for supporting or participating in extreme sports. I guess I should admit that I found two things interesting - Mat Hoffman nearly killed himself when he was attempting to break his own record for height reached on a BMX bike but eventually succeeded, and Travis Pastrana won the first freestyle motorcycle trick contest at 14. Other than those two randomly interspaced interesting tidbits, I was completely bored by this DVD. If you're interested in paying for someone to advertise to you, go ahead and buy it. If you're looking for a movie or just a series of cool extreme sports clips, look elsewhere.

Amazing! Entertaining! I didn't want to miss a second!
I enjoyed every minute of this captivating, lively, and fun extreme sport documentary. I promise that you will be so engaged whether you plan to watch it alone or with a bunch of friends. To be honest, I am not a real sport-fan, but "Keep Your Eyes Open" entertained me immensely. Awesome film!

Amazing! Entertaining! I didn't want to miss a thing!
I enjoyed every minute of this captivating, lively, and fun extreme sport documentary. I promise that you will be so engaged whether you plan to watch it alone or with a bunch of friends. To be honest, I am not a real sport-fan, but "Keep Your Eyes Open" entertained me immensely. Awesome film!

To Gillian on Her 37th Birthday
Released in DVD by Columbia Tristar Hom (01 April, 2003)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Director: Michael Pressman
Starring: Peter Gallagher, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Claire Danes
Michelle Pfeiffer's husband, television producer David E. Kelley (Ally McBeal), is partially responsible for this entertaining tearjerker about a widower (Peter Gallagher) who can't let go of his late wife and whose relationship with his adolescent daughter (Claire Danes) is stalled as a result. Invited for a weekend at the beach by his worried sister-in-law (Kathy Baker), Gallagher's character faces various humiliations (he's been set up to meet a single woman) and fatherly crises (his growing girl is attracted to a local boy). Pfeiffer plays the ghost of the dead woman and Danes is terrific, but it's Gallagher who gets a rare opportunity to carry the ball for an entire feature, and he does it very well. Michael Pressman directed what is, in the end, a very nice movie. --Tom Keogh
Average review score:

Disappointing
First of all, for the caliber of actors in this movie, they deserved a better script. Michelle Pfeifer and Peter Gallagher are class acts, but really this movie just did not dig deep enough. I have read all the rave reviews of Claire Danes, as I have read all the raves in the past and I am beside myself. I mean she has mastered the part of the proverbial angst-ridden pouting teenager to a tee. If this is her niche, so be it. The premise of the story is pretty decent -- a man loses his wife in a tragic freak accident and has a hard time moving on. Completely understandable. Then his annoying sister in law and her equally annoying husband arrive and proceed to berate the poor guy for mooning over a wife that is dead. Oh my god, stop the presses. These people had the sensitivity of androids. It would have been nice to see him kick these people out of the house, but then the film would'nt drone on and on, This is a good film for a rainy day. But I expected more.

Great acting and deep emotions make this a must see!
This film is very moving. It will remind any viewer not to take their loved ones for granted. The film gets you thinking about how to prepare and makes you ask yourself, how will I react when I lose the love of my life. Enjoy!

I Relate Deeply To This Movie
Having lost my wife under similiar circumstances, I experienced exactly What Peter Gallagher's acting expressed in this Film. His moving potrail of deep grief was so much like what I was experiencing it was chilling. The film did make me realize, that its time to move on.

The Main Event
Released in DVD by Warner Home Video (01 July, 2003)
MPAA Rating: PG (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Director: Howard Zieff
Starring: Barbra Streisand and Ryan O'Neal
Comedic misfire from the mid-1970s in a futile attempt to bottle the same lightning that struck when Barbra Streisand teamed with Ryan O'Neal in What's Up, Doc? Here, Streisand plays a spoiled rich girl, the head of a bankrupt cosmetics company, who discovers she's lost everything--except her ownership of the contract of a washed-up boxer (O'Neal, known for his combative nature offscreen). So she tries to rally this dispirited pug into a comeback that will earn the kinds of purses that will put her back on her feet. Naturally, in the process romantic sparks are kindled. But despite a loud and energetic performance by Streisand, this Howard Zieff comedy doesn't add up to much. --Marshall Fine
Average review score:

Funny, Entertaining but I've seen better
The Main Event was the first Streisand picture I ever saw. I loved it at the theaters. But since then I've seen many more of her movies on VHS. I have to say it's a good film but not her best. I liked "Yentl" or "Owl & Pussycat" or "A Star Is Born" much better. Her acting is superb, so is Ryan's. But the storyline is a little weak compared to other movies she is in. I reccommend it its just not her very best movie.

Good movie, but a PG rating?????
I liked the movie, it's fun and funny but what really surprised and shocked me was: PG RATING? Come on! 1. They show two butts in the movie, there is a lot of adult talk, and a lot of hintings to sexuality? It is a good movie, but I mean one would think more about the point of view of watching it depending on the rating of the movie.
All in all, this is a quite good movie which I like
Recommended, it's a lot of fun

She cant make a bad movie.
It has been quite a while since i have actually seen The Main Event but i have been trying to find it in the stores on video for quite a long time. I can remember loving the movie. There was a lot of screeming and yelling...but isnt that what boxers do. I thought the way they pick on each other is cute. I thought Barbra was precious. It is one of those movies that you come out feeling good which is hard to find these days.

Party Monster
Released in Theatrical Release by ()
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Directors: Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato
Starring: Macaulay Culkin, Seth Green, and Wilson Cruz
Average review score:

Monstrously bad
This biopic of club kid/murderer Michael Alig is monstrously bad. The quality of the script, acting and style are on par with your average WB teen melodrama, but with a gigantic budget for drugs. If Macaulay Culkin intended this to be his comeback vehicle, think again Mac.

The only reedeming qualities of this flick are the costumes, Diana "Christina Crawford" Scarwid as Mama Alig with a coiffure by Hedwig and the Angry Inch, and Seth Green as Michael's pal and social mentor, James St. James.

Green portrays the most flamboyant character yet offers the most restrained performance, while parading around in outrageous costumes and six-inch heels. Yes, St. James is absolutely larger than life, but I didn't feel that Green was straining to emote, unlike the other actors. He was the only actor who wasn't completely tripped up by what a "controversial" personality he was portraying.

Additionally, this was one of the most homophobic gay films I've ever seen. Michael and his boyfriend lean in for a kiss and it fades to black? Give me a break.

sick and demented, a great time
I liked this movie to the point where I couldnt stand it anymore but all in all it was a good view. Culkin is ok but he is overpowered by the performance of Seth Green who shines in this flick. not for everyones taste. MArilyn Manson, Chloe Sevingy and Wilmer Valderama also star. highlight is when Seth Green and Culkin are on that talk show and Green is a troll

money , success , fame, glamour!
soundtrack note: Great track with Macauly via megaphone processed Vocal!
...But alas,,,having read James St. James's 'Disco Bloodbath' promptly upon it being published, i could somewhat fill in the 'blanks' of the final film.

After all the years of being aware of these 'celebrities' and their escapades... ///especially those who used to read Alig's "Project X" mag/// , , , OR really, any of those who lived/worked in those "stylish subculture underground clubs" found in many metro areas during the oh-so-clever-and-gay 'Pre-Rave' club days will probably appreciate in some way this docu-dramatic "trip" into remembering the times back then ,,,

I forsee that someday = likely around 2013 , the "Special edition Directors edition +plus+ " DVD(s) and soundtrack will be must-own-items for multitudes of new baby club creatures!

H.O.T.S.
Released in DVD by Anchor Bay Entertainment (11 July, 2000)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Gerald Seth Sindell
Average review score:

Silly 1970's fun
I saw this movie as a teenager at the old Paramount theater in San Juan. So it brings back some great memories of days when one had to struggle to see naughty R-rated movies. Seeing it again as an adult was interestimg, The humor is pretty dumb, but the girls are still sexy. And the movie has a "devil-may-care" attitude which is refreshing.
The strip football game is fun to watch.
The DVD is pretty plain. It just features a trailer. It would have been nice to have has a director's or cast commentary. Or to see how the HOTS girls are doing. Although, perhaps, its better to remember them as they were back in the 70's.

Sexy skin shots
Saw this movie when HBO had it on - years ago. Remember it for having a weak story line, but it more than made up for it with female full nudity (all thru the movie)! Young flesh is always nice to view, especially their sports competition at the movies end.

Help Out The Seals (H.O.T.S.)
This is the infamous HOTS in all of its (topless) glory. Fun 80's college flick about snooty (and hot) sorority girls hounded by cute, big-chested outcast girls who form their own sorority as competition. Plenty of topless swims, towel fights, hot scenes with boys, and campus pranks. Lots of flesh and lots of humor. Ultimately, the girls settle their differences in a game of strip football. You get the idea.

I don't need to tell you this isn't exactly Chariots of Fire. For what it is, it's worth it for get the DVD. The transfer and sound are good, I don't recall any extras. This isn't the DVD you get for the extras. The "extras" are in the film itself.

America's Sweethearts
Released in DVD by Columbia Tri-Star (04 February, 2003)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Director: Joe Roth
Starring: Julia Roberts and John Cusack
America's Sweethearts is just the kind of romantic froth that makes for pleasant viewing on a lazy, rainy day. While Julia Roberts, John Cusack, and Catherine Zeta-Jones offer high-wattage marquee value, costar and cowriter Billy Crystal reworks Singin' in the Rain for latter-day Hollywood, where estranged superstars Gwen (Zeta-Jones) and Eddie (Cusack) reluctantly promote their latest movie by pretending their messily disputed relationship is still going strong. The studio chief (Stanley Tucci) is desperate for a hit, so he hires a seasoned publicist (Crystal) to orchestrate a press junket that will cast everyone in a profitable light. The catch: The director (Christopher Walken) has abducted his own film in an act of artistic extortion, and Gwen's sister and longtime assistant Kiki (Roberts) is the true object of Eddie's desire.

Chaos ensues at the luxury hotel where the junket is scheduled, and America's Sweethearts pokes easy fun at the cynical machinery that keeps Hollywood running. Quotable quips are delivered in abundance, and while Zeta-Jones is readily convincing as a bitchy narcissist, Roberts effortlessly steals the show with her trademark charms. All of which makes America's Sweethearts lightly entertaining, even though it never rises (like Roberts's earlier Notting Hill) to the level of classic romantic comedy, hampered by a script that too often substitutes easy laughs for ripe satirical invention, flashing a phony grin when it should be baring its fangs. --Jeff Shannon

Average review score:

I Liked It, But....
...the miscasting was putting Cusack as the male lead. He's an O.K. actor, but not suited for this. It's too bad Clooney wasn't avaliable. He would have definitely been a better cast. It would have put a punch in the film seeing that he and Roberts already established good film chemistry in Oceans Eleven. The powers that be blew it.

And...Who turned the voltage down on Billy Crystal? Usually he's so over the top, it's hard to get to reel himself in and I thought that since publicists have a reputation for being smarmy he would be chewing up scenes like a brat chews Bubble yum. He was a bit subdued here. He did however manage get one "A Man Goes to a Rabbi" joke in.

But everthing else was fine. Zeta-Jones is deliciously self absorbed and bitchy, Hank Azaria gives a hi-LARRY-us performance which rivals his great "Spartacus" in The Bird Cage, and it becomes howling funny when Christopher Walken previews the movie that becomes a reality show. Funny, funny, funny stuff.

Roberts? All she has to do is smile that 100 watts smile she has...

Sweethearts: Roberts and Cusack
It's about time Roberts made a movie with Cusack. NICE thing they had there. I loved that Julia played a newly thin girl. She did a great job of graciously accepting compliments that sometimes came across as though she had looked HORRID before. Her pancake scene with the butter--"If this were my sister, there'd be butter. She'd have them out there milking a cow right now. Kiki, is someone smoking? Is someone daring to smoke within 500 feet of me? Find them and make them stop, Kiki!" Hilarious. Catherine Zeta-Jones did a fabulous job as a spoiled movie star--who was spoiled long before stardom--and her scene at the end where she tries to do damage control is excellently played. Cusack is charming as a the jilted husband still in love with his ex-wife, AND as the man falling in love with her sister and trying to figure it all out. Hank--Catherine's lover--is terrific with his accent and his machcismo. Nicely done movie. Very pleasant.

Terrific!
I bought this movie mainly because Catherine Zeta-Jones, one of my favorite actresses is in it. But I thought that every single actor did a great job in this movie. It's so funny and sweet at the same time. John Cusack did, as usual, a wonderful job. He's first seen in a wellness center due to his recent break-up with his wife Gwen (Zeta-Jones). He executes the role in a wonderful way. I don't think that any other actor could have played the role any better.

Julia Roberts was wonderful too. I had never really seen her as the "sweet" one before in a movie. She is like Cinderella in a way. She plays Gwens's sister Kiki and basically does everything for her. I loved her in this movie.

Catherine was as usual, spectacular. She plays the vixen so well! That kind of role seems to fit her quite well, at least from what I have seen in "Chicago" and "Intolerable Cruelty."

Billy Crystal. What can I say about him except he's great! Stanley Tucci was quite funny too as the executive. And I loved Seth Green's character. He was just goofy. But in a good way.

Then of course you have the totally hilarious Hank Azaria. Everytime the man came on screen I laughed. He had a funny line all of the time. He is just a terrific actor in general. I also loved Chrisopher Walken. You would expect him to play this really dark, creepy guy, but instead, he doesn't. He's very...interesting. I won't give it away.

Anyway, if you love romantic comedies with lots of twists, this is the move to watch!

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