Actuarial Science Movie Reviews
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Beyond Bad
sci-fi stupid
entertaining
If The Phantom Menace was the setup, then Attack of the Clones is the plot-progressing payoff, and devoted Star Wars fans are sure to be enthralled. Ten years after Episode I, Padmé Amidala (Natalie Portman), now a senator, resists the creation of a Republic Army to combat an evil separatist movement. The brooding Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) is resentful of his stern Jedi mentor, Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor), tormented by personal loss, and showing his emerging "dark side" while protecting his new love, Amidala, from would-be assassins. Youthful romance and solemn portent foreshadow the events of the original Star Wars as Count Dooku (a.k.a. Darth Tyranus, played by Christopher Lee) forges an alliance with the Dark Lord of the Sith, while lavish set pieces showcase George Lucas's supreme command of all-digital filmmaking. All of this makes Episode II a technological milestone, savaged by some critics as a bloated, storyless spectacle, but still qualifying as a fan-approved precursor to the pivotal events of Episode III. --Jeff Shannon

I feel sick!
Some rousing action amid boring stories.** 1/2/*****
Attack of the Clones-This sequel to Phantom Menace is, in the end, not really better or worse than its predecessor. The dialogue is just as awful as before and there's an insipid love story that's not the slightest bit romantic or believable. The cast is about on the same level as before, with Ewan Mcgregor impressing me a bit more with his almost dead-on Alec Guinness impression. Unfortunately, the political backdrop is boring and a little confusing, and most of the action sequences are surprisingly dull, the only true exception being the knockout colosseum battle sequence. The climactic lightsaber duel is a huge step backward from Episode I, there's no Ray Park/Darth Maul here to display versatile athleticism. The fact that Anakin Skywalker is a whiny teen doesn't bother me, that's the way he should be, but the fact that it's all noticeably acting on the part of Hayden Christensen is completely damning. Anyone under the age of fifteen will greatly enjoy the picture. Everyone else, well, that's a little tougher to tell.
20th Century Fox has in commen with Paramount....

Godzilla did it better......The lower budget and B-Level acting are pretty evident through out this whole picture. This might have explained why later on, Ray did his effects work movies by going to Europe, where the budgets were bigger. There were better production values there, and he turned his attention away from Atomic age monsters, to the creatures of classical mythology, where he would do his best work.
In the early 1950;s, they turned out so many B-atomic age monster pictures, but the only one that has really endured as well as it as, was a creature that came from movie studios in Japan, a creature we know as Godzilla.
Ray Harryhausen Is The Man
A Giant Octopus and Faith Domergue, too!Enter Our Hero - Kenneth Tobey - commander of a nuclear sub that has been molested by the monster. With the help of marine biologists Donald Curtis and Faith Domergue, he is able to identify the beast and go after it, leading to many scenes of Faith in a bathing suit that absolutely boggled my mind when I first saw this as a kid - and still has that effect today. If I could have been assured that I would meet someone like her in the field, I would have devoted my life to marine biology.
Our intrepid team finally tracks the monster to San Francisco, where it tries to come ashore at Fisherman's Wharf. Driven back by flame throwers, it takes its anger out on the Golden Gate Bridge, a scene that must have thrilled the San Francisco Chamber of Commerce. (They later complained.) Finally, Tobey and Curtis dispatch the monster with the help of Tobey's nuclear sub, as if we thought we'd never see the sub again.
Sure, we know the octopus has only six arms - this fact is solidly enmeshed in film lore. And, Who Cares? The movie moves along nicely and has several chilling moments. The acting is first-rate and Harryhausen makes the octopus so effective that we hardly notice its lack of the proper amount of arms. Sam Katzman was the producer, and Sam was notoriously cut-rate; the sort of producer a studio loves as he never goes over whatever miniscule budget he is given. In earlier years Sam produced the East Side Kids movies and the Lugosi horror series for Monogram. Just be pleasantly surprised that Kaufman had enough money in the budget to afford a Harryhausen. In his later movie, "The Giant Claw," he didn't have the funds and so had to go to Mexico for cheaper special effects. Anyone who saw that movie still has aching ribs from laughing at the title monster.
Another nice touch for viewers is that the transfer is clear and sharp. No tenth-rate print, as is so often the case with the horror-sci-fi genre. Great viewing at a great price. What more need be said, besides the fact Faith Domergue is in it?


ZERO STARS: I'll make this short and unsweet.
Square pigs, killer robots, and crotch engines oh my.....The story involves the last of the independant space truckers, Dennis Hopper, and how he's hired to take a shipment of supicious cargo to Earth which turns out to be ultra high tech killer robots that someone is planning to use to overthrow Earth's government.
Anyway, there's some mildy amusing scenes, and stuff happens which all lead up to the climatic scene at the end involving the killer robots. As I said before, the special effects look really good and it's obvious that a lot of time and effort was spent in this area. The pirate ship was really well done. And, in Stuart Gordon fashion, the pirate captain looked like something out of Re-animator or From Beyond, from his half flesh, half metal head to his pull start groin.
The script wasn't really that strong, and some of the actors almost seem embarassed to be in the movie at times, but they perform adequately with what they are given. I thought Charles Dance (Alien 3, The Golden Child, Gosford Park) played his role quite well. And it was nice to see Dennis Hopper play something other that a deranged lunatic for a change.
All in all, fun, light entertainment, just don't expect too much from this movie in terms of a good script or decent character development.
question ?

Sony Entertainment is really cheap.
DVD Boxset of U.S. VersionsMost disappointing to me is that these films are presented in 1.33:1 pan & scan instead of the original widescreen aspect ratio. All the films are Englished dubbed, no original language sound tracks included.
A Nice Set, Some Flaws - But It's Godzilla!I dont know why people complained about the transfers so much - They are actually pretty good. Maybe something is wrong with their Stereo or Screen. I have a big screen and 5-piece sorround stereo set up so I notice alot of the details.
Anyway, this is a nice set. Good Transfers, All the films rock -
but the inclusion of 'Rodan' sags the rating a bit.


this is both dumb and hilarious
ONE OF THE WORST
Bad Snake. Actors With a Name. Movie with Nothing Else.

Carnosaur (1993)
Extremely Gory Dinosaur Action/Horror Flick!REVIEW: I think this was a pretty much okay dinosaur movie. Everything is pretty much good, but the dinosaur effects... well, let's just say they're no Jurassic Park (1993). Since it was made by Roger Corman, it's automatically a B-movie. Also, there is a subplot about government soldiers shooting people left and right just becuase of the virus, which I think is unneeded. Also, this movie is extremely gory, with dinosaurs ripping people to shreds. But, all the violence makes this movie sort of fun.
CARNOSAUR RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Cube 2:Hypercube,
Hypercube
Great Special Effects/ Mediocre DialogueThe special effects are great with Salvador Dali walls, variable time speeds (the cheesy scene with the dead mannequins excepted). But what we have on the human level isn't much. The characters are all connected to an all-powerful fascist corporation called Izon, which makes weapons for the military.
I liked the ending, but the problem was it's obvious the writer tagged the ending onto it without going back over the script to make the characters consistent with it. And the reason the mastermind gives for being in the cube makes no sense. However there is some comic relief also. Like when Kate asks the senile lady, "Do you know why we're here?" and she says, "I was never good at philosophy." And of course the lovers going around and around in the room.
If anything this film makes many nods to 2001: Space Odyssey. It begins with a close-up of an eye a la 2001, has the bright white walls like the 2001 spaceships and the weird room at the end, has the time acceleration like the 2001 ending does, and the Hypercube ending is like the "Infinity and Beyond" segment.
Overall ill-conceived, but worth watching as good entertainment. The original was better though low budget, and of course the original concept is based on the Twilight Zone episode: "5 characters in search of an Exit".


Virtual MessThe commentary track has Leonard and co-producer and fellow screenwriter Gimel Everett, talk endlessly about how lucky they were to make this film (I'll say). The deleted scenes offer a better sense of the story. Too bad they were not incorporated into the movie. It might have made a difference. The storyboards, and other making of stuff don't seem like fun, if the movie isn't any good...Buyer Beware
Visuals?Of course, judging on a 10-year-old movie's visual effects isn't easy. But in my opinion, compared to its time visuals in Jurrasic Park, Terminator 2, Total Recall, etc.. it's nothing. Perhaps the problem is that there are TOO many visuals that it must have made them concentrate less in each scene.
The movie itself is only TRYING to do something. I felt that the director was trying to make the movie an icon in Science Fiction like '2001 : A Space Odyssey' and 'Blade Runner' but instead through artificial intelligence, through Virtual Reality. The movie revolves around the same idea of FRANKESTIEN, except that the cause of the transformation is VIRTUAL REALITY.
The movie even doesn't explain how virtual reality could achieve what the story is revolving around; increasing brain activity and unlocking humans deep potentials. All they do is put the person in Virtual Reality and through lots of images on him with a very fast speed, but is this logical?
As for the DVD itself: the video quality is fine. Of course, it's not comparable to Total Recall which was 2 years before it, but it's fairly good since this movie isn't a huge one to deserve much attention. The extras on the other side (it's double sided DVD; weird, the movie took 4.16GB on one side and the extras took 1.8GB on the other side) need no further explaination.
Most notably are the deleted scenes. Most of these scenes aren't extended scenes or scenes which explained more about the story. They're actually scenes that would've changed the story 180 degrees. Much like the alternate endings on some DVDs, except that some of these scenes provide alternate story...
A fabulously under-rated movie

where is continuity?For starters The Doctor is now the inventor of the tardis and seems to be from earth rather than Gallifrey. Susan has regressed in age and Barbara is not her teacher but rather her sister, while Ian (also supposed to be Susans' teacher) is Barbara's clumsy slapstick boyfriend.
In my opinion the writer was either too lazy to think up an ingenious way to keep the storyline in tact, or was kept from doing so by executive types. We should all know how those guys get when profit is involved.
Aside from the fact they butchered the relationships between the Doctor and his companions the story kept true to the first meeting of the Daleks as in the original series.
After removing the thought of Barbara being the Doctors' granddaughter and constantly reminding my self that she and Ian were Susans' teachers; and Susan just looked extremely young for her age, it became quite enjoyable. However if you must see this story look for the William Hartnell, black and white version first, they are essentially the same story.
In conclusion, maybe for the family; my seven year old son preferred the Peter Cushing version, so I am led to believe it may be more enjoyable for the whole family.
Talking trash cans will rule the earth!!
Daleks and the Doctor on a bigger screenWhile the Daleks' story is unchanged for the film (cold conquerors of a dying world), and though this flick otherwise follows the plot of the serial in which the Daleks were introduced, the flick otherwise changes the Doctor's story. Now, instead of being a time-lord, the Doctor is a curmudgeonly human inventor (named "Doctor Who" - the characters who are his granddaughters are never mentioned by that name) who manages to construct a crude space-time machine which is bigger inside than out, and just happens to look like a Police call box on the outside. Accidentally sending the time/space ship on its way - the Doctor and crew (his two granddaughters and the older one's date) - vanish from Earth and wind up on a blasted alien world. The Doctor tricks his passengers into going out exploring - he's too much of an adventurer to pass the alien world up. When a huge (and seemingly abandoned) city looms nearby, he goes to investigate, hoping - he tells the others - to find extra mercury for a critical fluid link. Instead, when the city proves to be home to nasty sounding Daleks, they are all captured. The Doctor is then forced to learn the nature of these mechanized creatures and find a way to escape and link up with the Thals - green-skinned descendants of the Daleks' ancient enemies. Though the Thals are stubbornly peaceful, you know that the Doctor will lead them to rise up against the Daleks.
This was a great flick - not quite faithful to Who-lore, but confident in its own way. Cushing is an unforgettable Who, though he could have done with the TV incarnation's more hard edged (here he's a kindly old guy with a child's sense of adventure). Being a human inventor raises some questions, but none that get in the way of the fun, and anyway sticking to the TV-show's premise of the Doctor's being a time-lord would complicate things (the story would have to explain his origin AND the Daleks') The Daleks, on the other hand, are faithfully translated to the big-screen - their huge city, their screeching voices and their fascist-style cruelty fit them to a tee (if anything, the movie Daleks are even louder here) The flick ends on a climactic battle that won't dissappoint.
It takes over 90 minutes to resolve this "is-he-or-isn't-he" question, while Spencer continually runs away or fights when cornered, and is thwarted every time he attempts to find evidence to prove his innocence.
The problem with this film is that, given what Hollywood is today, there are only three or four possible endings. These endings are immediately imaginable and given Hollywood's love of a twist ending, the choices are reduced further.
Most intelligent people I've discussed this film with guessed the ending before I even finished describing the premise.
So since you basically know how the film is going to end, there is absolutely ZERO suspense. Instead you are just waiting around for the "shocking revelation" that you guessed an hour ago.
*yawn* What a lead balloon.
Gary Sinise as Spencer Olham, Vincent D'Onofrio as the vicious anti-infiltration agent pursuing Olham, and Madeline Stowe as Olham's wife Mia are all great actors, and the lovely Ms. Stowe offers the added bonus of being fun to look at. But good acting and good looks cannot save this wretched movie. "Impostor" was a bad idea that should never have been made.
If you want to watch a film where the nature of the protagonist takes turns you *don't* expect, try Kevin Costner's 1987 film "No Way Out". I'm no fan of Kevin Costner, but at least that film succeeded in doing what this film utterly failed to do--surprise me.